My man is blind. Which, now that I think about it, makes me wonder if he has a clue what I look like. I know he doesn't know what color my eyes are. He thinks they are blue. They are not, they're green. It's an ongoing joke I won't let him ever live down. But that's another post. This one is about his eyesight.
So, he's blind and with every eyeglass-wearing person, he needs new spectacles every few years. Today was that blessed day. I asked if I go with him to vote on the new pair. He shot me down without a second thought, "I've been doing this since I was 16, Michelle. I can handle it" Yeah yeah, but I don't wear glasses every day so it's cool to me. Freaking humor me, man. But Nope. He didn't want me to tag along. I called him a name I can't say here. Starts with F, ends with head. Some day I'll tell the story about that 'term of endearment', too.
Let me tell you something about Peter. He's is killer funny. The man cracks me up. Everyone wants to find that person who makes them laugh, right? I know I always did. I dated many funny guys. Some were even like seriously stand up comedian funny. But what made it different with Peter is he thinks I'm killer funny too. We're like a matched set of really super funny people - to each other. If no one else ever cracks a smile over us, it's cool. We'll be kicking back laughing out our own damn selves.
This smarty pants husband of mine comes walking in with these on, and asks me what I think.
seriously? we're close. soul mates (hurl) even. But in those first few seconds of looking at him I didn't think I could tell him that those were quite possibly the ugliest pair of glasses ever made. How do you tell someone that? "oh yes dear, those silver dollar sized, amber colored, way too narrow, BI-focal glasses look horrible, dear."
Thank God he let me off the hook quickly. He told me that they - quite literally - came from the "ugly box" of glasses. Apparently, Peter told his Dr. about my desire to 'help' with this process and they devised this plan to show up with the nastiest part of glasses in the free world. Possibly on the planet.
I called him the F slash head name and then peed my pants with laughter. His real glasses will be here next week.
2 months ago