Thursday, November 20, 2008

double take

WARNING - DESPITE WHAT MY NEW HEADER SAYS, THIS POST CONTAINS SWEAR WORDS AND A QUESTIONABLE PICTURES.
NO LITTLE EYES PEEKING OVER YOUR SHOULDER.

You've been warned...

Imagine an old school strip mall. Little, dumpy, and in desperate need of a face lift.
Now imagine one of your favorite lunchtime pizza joints is in this mall. You're hungry and decide that peperoni and mushroom with light sauce is today's choice for filling the mound that is your stomach. (okay MY stomach is a mound. Yours is probably nice and flat, bitch)

You place your phone order and carefully figure out the drive time so you can arrive just as they pull that yummy pizza out of the oven. As you drive up you can smell the deliciousness soon to be yours. The mound (or flatness, bitch!) growls and your mouth waters, ah! the excitement.

The parking lot is full, which makes sense as this is a fantastic little eatery, so you have to park down the way a bit. There's a spot in front of Adam & Eve, a little lingerie (I think!) shop. Cool, not a long walk. Besides, it's late fall and the weather is perfect. Exactly why you live in Phoenix, so you can wear flip flops and capris when picking up your lunch and not catch a chill or start to sweat. My kind of day!

Then you notice it. The mannequin. You've always seen her but never really paid much mind because you've always loved their cool logo, with the half apple. "clever" you always think to yourself. Today, though, you notice the figure on the left. The one is a fancy red lace number. Pretty right? But WAIT?!?! back up that bus.... WTF IS THAT?


A MAN??? IN THE WINDOW DISPLAY??? IN A DRESS?

Sure as shit. That's a man,
in a nightie.
really?
WHY?
and as if that's not enough. Check out the woman. double wtf on her mouth?


SCREW LUNCH. now I just feel dirty.
m

6 comments:

Tammy said...

The header says less swearing not NO swearing. That is some scary sh** and deserves a few exclamations! The woman mannequin reminds me of that celebrity named Lisa Rinna...married to Harry Hamlin...and the mouth that always distracts me. I'm just glad you had a camera with you...that's something you have to see to believe.

Lisa said...

that's funny. but i think you should say bitch one more time. LOL

Kaelene said...

I think your post is still rated "PG" because you didn't say "bitch" six times or more! LOL
That is a little twisted, that store!

Kerry said...

Haha, I knew about the online store, but not a real store. ;) Where in Phoenix is that??? LOL!

Me thinks that female one also does double duty as a 'companion'. IYKWIM. Is she silicon? ;)

But most importantly.... how was the PIZZA??? Geeze, you have me salivating now!!!! And capris and flip flops....bitch. ;)

Unknown said...

Ha. Hahahahahaha!
Dang. I want pizza now.

And capris and flip flops
Kerry- even better? We get to wear sweatshirts with our capris and flip flops. Perfect!!

laura said...

o.m.g.

that is hysterical!!